我一週可做五次有氧運動，最近發現一個激勵自己的新方法－邊跑邊看《與卡戴珊姊妹同行》（譯注）。今早，跑步機螢幕上播著這個實境秀，讓我經歷了一場前所未有的多重情緒衝擊。羨慕、嫉妒、受挑逗、高興、生氣、難過、困惑、陷入沉思、腦袋一片空白…各種情緒一股腦地湧上。

這讓我跑得更快，更久，超乎以前所能想像的極限。我感覺好像在太空中衝刺，腳踏在一個不斷轉動，巨大的11面體上。這近似「球體」的十一面體是由各種物質組成的，如：花、陰蒂、MDMA、大腦、虎皮、小提琴弦、眾多BBC頻道、眼淚、衛生棉條、雲朵、各種昆蟲…等，並以光速不斷向外擴張。

我越跑，感覺越像是在「磨平」這顆球體表面凹凸不平的部分，並將它越磨越小，小到在實質上或概念上更可理解，易於掌控。最後，當它縮到原子般大小，幾乎無法察覺時，我的脂肪也一同消失了。如此，我知道自己又完成了一次成功的有氧訓練。

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譯注：《與卡戴珊姊妹同行》，電視實境節目，自2007年起在E!頻道播映至今(2014)，節目以卡戴珊家族名媛姊妹與其母方家族為主角，呈現名門奢華生活。

I found a new way to motivate myself while doing cardio (Which is up to 5x a week); Watching “Keeping up with the Kardashians” .

The show was playing on the treadmill monitor this morning. Never before did I experience such multiplicity of emotions at once. I was envious, sexually aroused, jealous, happy, angry, sad, confused, contemplative, mindless…etc, all at once.

This drove me to run faster and longer than I had previously thought possible. It was like I was sprinting space and my legs were cycling on top of a gigantic,11 dimensional ’sphere’ constructed from various substances such as flowers, clitoris, MDMA, brains, tiger skin, violin strings, BBCs, tears, tampons, clouds, various insects, and etc, which extends to reach the sky at the speed of light. 

The more I run, the more I seem to be ’smoothening out’ the uneven surface of this sphere, making it smaller, more comprehensible and controllable both materially and conceptually. And when it finally shrunk, alongside my fat, down to the size of an atom and was imperceptible to my senses, I knew I've had a successful cardio session.